Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
