Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You may now shotgun with the bride
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
