508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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