Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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