How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
