so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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