Whod you bang
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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