So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize