did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
