She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
