If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
