She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
