Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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