i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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