You made me cry and you don't even care
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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