i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize
