i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
