I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I just cut my nipple shaving
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize