if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
