Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Randomize
