Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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