We're facebook friends in real life
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
My life is pants optional.
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