she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
