we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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