Grow some girl-balls and come out already
he thought i was a dude.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
