I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it ðŸ˜
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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