i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize