I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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