all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
