Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
