I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
