Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
