Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
MIDGETS
????
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
