That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I've blown a few things in my day
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
