he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
