I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
