This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
