what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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