Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
