Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
