Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
