How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
