and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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