I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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