You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize