I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
