oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
