Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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