the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
