How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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