I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Such a big mess for such a small penis
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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